dimanche, avril 23, 2006

After "Mother, May InI?"

"I resolve not to run on hatred but, instead, to use what I love, words, for the sake of the people that I love."

-June Jordan (amended from past to present tense in more ways than one), Civil Wars
Research (for me) is not more than a fishing expedition. I cast a line and wait. I don't throw anything back. I leave not satiated but not so hungry. Water-logged. It's more like rassling obscured possibility. My aims change. I don't find fish*, and if that is what I thought I wanted, I failed only in self-conception. Again, I don't throw anything back.
"My life seems to be an increasing revelation of the intimate faces of universal struggle. You begin with your family and the kids on your block and next you open your eyes to what you call your people and that leads into land reform into Black english into Angola leads you back into your own bed where you lie by yourself wondering if you deserve to be peaceful or trusted or desired or left to the freedom of your own unfaltering heart. And the scale shrinks to the size of a skull: your own interior cage.

And then if you're lucky..."

JJ finished that thought but it seems a little premature of me to cite, chirp, claim as mine own. Anyway "Back to the grill again!" (As much Serch as "Cooking Session" Blakey) I got work to do.

*"I'm still standing; I'm still strong!"